You know that feeling when you notice that the entire day has gone by and you didn’t have to remind anyone to rinse or wash their dish? Yeah, me neither. Ooh, I know! What about when you walk into the bathroom and there aren’t clothes or towels on the floor and toothpaste smeared in the sink? Yeah… haven’t experienced that one since having kiddos. Obviously, there are times I feel like a maid instead of a mom. I keep telling myself that they’ll figure it out, they’ll surprise me one day and remember without me reminding. Seriously, though… How many meals are eaten at our kitchen table each day? (Three) How many times do I have to remind someone of what’s expected? (At least once a day) At some point, they will make it theirs and not just parrot what they see and hear.
It’s not really as terrible as it sounds. Our kiddos are happy kiddos. They laugh and play together more than they bicker and fight. They smile more than they frown, they embrace more than they push away (unless they’re being tickled – that changes things), and they want to spend time with us. I know, I know… Just wait till they hit puberty… We did experience a few tough years with our oldest daughter, but it was only a few and those years are already in the rearview mirror. It was a coming-of-age period that we experienced – could have been better and could have been much worse – and I can already see a bit of it on the horizon with our other kiddos.
As a little girl, I was all about missionary work – telling people about Jesus. Picture a petite (scrawny), strawberry-blond 4yo with a little New Testament telling people Jesus is coming soon! I don’t think I was even “saved” at that point, but I was on the mission field! I was at the stage of parroting what I saw and heard without making it truly mine. It wasn’t till I was closer to being 8 or 9 that I made the decision for myself to ask Jesus into my heart. Looking back at that moment, I don’t doubt the sincerity, but I think it was more of a fear-based sincerity.
We’re teaching our 8-month-old a little bit of sign language. In teaching our other kiddos a few signs, we were able to lessen the communication-gap frustrations. We teach food, more, water, please, and thank you. At this age, she is mirroring (or going to) what she sees and hears. Her first word will be what she’s heard (I’m hoping for Mama). And as she gets older, she’ll enter a stage of a bit more independence while still parroting.
To some extent, don’t we always parrot our parents? There are memes on social media about someone opening their mouth and their mother came out. Yeah, that’s happened quite a bit with me. After the parroting years, I went through the period that produces a lot of frustrations (don’t forget the gray hairs). Whatever I was, whoever I was, I was going to find out myself without anyone telling me. I had heard and seen all I wanted to hear and see from the majority of adults that were in my life – I was tired of parroting. This is when the logical brain functions disappear and illogical emotions take over. I was no longer telling people about Jesus, no longer scared-into-salvation, but more of the devil-may-care mindset. I heard that God was good, but only if you color inside the lines. Well, I’m not very good at art.
It took years (about a decade) for me to decide that I had either missed something or that I was just desperately lacking (Hmm, maybe both?).
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Mark my words! I, Paul, tell you that if you let yourselves be circumcised, Christ will be of no value to you at all. Again I declare to every man who lets himself be circumcised that he is obligated to obey the whole law. You who are trying to be justified by the law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace. For through the Spirit we eagerly await by faith the righteousness for which we hope. For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. Galatians 5:1-6 NIV
As I’ve been reading through Galatians, I can’t help but see grace, grace, and more grace (Grace upon grace, John 1:16). It also includes a bit of a coming-of-age. This coming-of-age story is from slavery to freedom and adoption. Take a look at Galatians 4:21-31:
Tell me, you who want to be under the law, are you not aware of what the law says? For it is written that Abraham had two sons, one by the slave woman and the other by the free woman. His son by the slave woman was born according to the flesh, but his son by the free woman was born as the result of a divine promise. These things are being taken figuratively: The women represent two covenants. One covenant is from Mount Sinai and bears children who are to be slaves: This is Hagar. Now Hagar stands for Mount Sinai in Arabia and corresponds to the present city of Jerusalem, because she is in slavery with her children. But the Jerusalem that is above is free, and she is our mother. For it is written: “Be glad, barren woman, you who never bore a child; shout for joy and cry aloud, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband.” Now you, brothers and sisters, like Isaac, are children of promise. At that time the son born according to the flesh persecuted the son born by the power of the Spirit. It is the same now. But what does Scripture say? “Get rid of the slave woman and her son, for the slave woman’s son will never share in the inheritance with the free woman’s son.” Therefore, brothers and sisters, we are not children of the slave woman, but of the free woman.
One covenant is of flesh – slavery to the dos and don’ts of the Law that we can never do perfectly (and perfection is required to fulfill this covenant). The other covenant is of a divine promise – something that we could never earn and something that will never beat us over the head with guilt and condemnation (or whip us across the back). Under the Law, we anxiously question whether or not we’re good enough, have done enough, or are worthy. Under the Divine Promise, we rest in the knowledge that He was more than good enough, did everything perfectly, and is worthy beyond our comprehension… for us.
Imagine my kiddos are required to rinse or wash their dishes, pick up their clothes, hang their towels, and make sure there’s no toothpaste mess left in the bathroom… all in order to be allowed to live in my home – it’s the Law. They forget even for a minute or two and they’re out! They get distracted and forget to hang their towel – Out! It’s not for my benefit to do it perfectly for them, but I want them to live in my home where it’s safe from the outside world. I want them to have the best, so I make the way possible for them.
Did Jesus need to become a man in order to be good enough for His Father? No. Did He need set aside His splendor so His Father would accept Him? No. Did Jesus need to give up everything that comes in the package of being God to be accepted by His Father? No! All that Jesus gave up, all that He did, and all that He endured was for our benefit! Is it the old covenant that sets us free or is it the Divine Promise?
But what does Scripture say? “Get rid of the slave woman and her son, for the slave woman’s son will never share in the inheritance with the free woman’s son.” Therefore, brothers and sisters, we are not children of the slave woman, but of the free woman. Galatians 4:30-31 NIV
For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. Galatians 5:6 NIV
The Bible doesn’t tell us that we loved God enough for Him to send Jesus to break us free from our shackles, but oh how He loved us enough!
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16 NIV
We get to live in the house, not as slaves, but as children of God – because He was so much more than enough.