While my husband would disagree with me, I really don’t think I’m nesting. I just don’t like waiting till the last minute. Getting a crib and setting it up, making sure we have some baby clothes and other baby necessities that are washed and ready is just good sense. I like to be prepared. So, my husband is wrong. Then again, he had a strong feeling this baby was a girl and the reveal simply confirmed it… he also knows when I’m going to suggest certain meals for dinner… and he knows other details about me that I have to stop and think about. But, I’m not nesting. I’m just not procrastinating – there’s a difference.
Since everything we saved in regards to having a baby is in a storage unit in Alaska, we are truly starting from scratch – at least till after the baby is born. I went through a mental checklist and started getting some things together. I even created an Amazon registry so others would have an idea of what we were needing. Outside of that, thrift shops are goldmines, Facebook Marketplace is a favorite, and my calendar has become a really good friend.
My latest find on Marketplace was a crib. This really catapulted my so called “nesting.” You can’t just leave it loaded in the van – it has to be brought in the house. It can’t just stay in pieces against the wall – it needs to be put together. It has to be set up where it will go, which means other things are going to have to be rearranged. I had the laundry going (had to wash the baby stuff – you never know who touched it in the store or on the assembly line), had the measuring tape out, and the urge for a grape soda hit me and seemed overwhelming. Yes… grape soda.
I’m not a soda person. If I have anything other than coffee or water, it’s usually tea or juice. We don’t have soda in the house (well, we do right now), and it’s a treat for the kiddos to have soda when we eat out. But oh, for grape soda! With our eldest, it was grape soda and bell peppers; our next daughter it was anything that was not fish. With our third… hmm… I think it was ice cream? And with our youngest, I really loved chai lattes and chicken Caesar sandwiches – and chocolate. This one has been relatively easy in regards to cravings. I spent the first two trimesters nauseated and really loving mandarin oranges, and now I’m really loving grape soda. And apple fritters. And coffee ice cream. And chicken Caesar salads. At least one of those is close to healthy, right?
Pregnancy cravings tend to be the butt of jokes and something to laugh at, but going through it so many times, I know the struggle is real. As I think about the different things I’ve craved through each pregnancy, I can’t help but think of other things I’ve craved in my life. Like many women out there, I’ve craved stability – spiritual, financial, physical, emotional, and relational. Those are the big ones. All of them contain little sub-categories, but I’m not going to delve into them today (I have too much “nesting” to do!). And nesting isn’t just for the material things – there’s a spiritual side to that, too. When the spiritual craving is satisfied, the other areas often sort themselves out, too.
I grew up in the church, told people the end was coming soon as a preschooler, and felt pretty confident that God loved me. There it is: spiritual. I also knew that I was never going to be enough, be able to do enough, and would never measure up – but thank God for grace! Basically, I was lower than scum, but God loved me and saved me. That may work for some – to hear about their failures, how they’re horrible, and how they deserve Hell, but there’s a huge danger there. There’s no spiritual stability.
I get on Facebook more often than I prefer – probably once a day (more if I’m shopping Marketplace), and I came across a post that really rubbed me wrong. There were grammatical errors, so this is not verbatim (I’m pregnant and OCD): I would rather hear my pastor preach on my sins than hear Jesus say, “Depart from me, I never knew you.” This made me think of my post a few weeks ago about teaching the Law versus teaching God’s love, grace, and goodness. If you missed that post, here’s a link for easy access: Knives and Wineskins.
My first response to the Facebook post put me on edge because I came from that. I came from listening to all the ways I fail and even attended a church, as an adult, where the pastor regularly put the congregation under condemnation.
In the movie Pretty Woman (I may be sharing a quote, but that does not mean I’m recommending the movie), Julia Roberts’ character has a line that has stayed with me since I saw the movie decades ago: “People put you down enough, you start to believe it… the bad stuff is easier to believe.” When people are told, week after week, that they’re sinners, they’re failures, they’ll never measure up, how can we expect those same people to believe the good that God has said about them? How can we expect them to believe that they’re more than conquerors (Romans 8:28-39) when they’re repeatedly told that they’re failures? How can they believe that they have been made new, are a new creation and the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus (II Corinthians 5:17-21) when they’re consistently told that they’re undeserving sinners?
It seems that there are many out there that think they can do the job of the Holy Spirit better than the Holy Spirit. Not only is it the job of the Holy Spirit to convict the world of sin (John 16:8-11), but there’s so much more! The Holy Spirit reveals truth (John 16:13), confirms our relationship with God (Romans 8:16), helps us to overcome sinful desires (Galatians 5:16-18), makes us holy (I Corinthians 6:11), teaches and reminds us of things learned (John 14:26), gives us power (Acts 1:8), and helps us by interceding for us (Romans 8:26).
The verse that’s being cited in the Facebook quote is Matthew 7:23. Jesus is addressing the fakes, the ones who look the part, but their hearts are far from God. They may be able to perform miracles, drive out demons, and prophesy, but they are producing fruit in their own strength, and not through God’s strength. Now I’m thinking about picking strawberries – no, it’s not the pregnancy… this time.
We recently took the kiddos to a strawberry-picking nursery. They’re right down the road from us and also serve homemade ice cream (not coffee ice cream though). Our kiddos had never experienced one of our favorite childhood memories: picking and eating strawberries, but only paying for what ends up in your bucket. We picked and ate, walked through the nursery, and enjoyed ice cream in the shade. And then we processed a lot of strawberries. They were good because they were ripe – not like what you buy in the grocery store, but there was still something not nearly as satisfying about the berries we had picked. They tasted good, but were a little over-watered. Too much watering will produce watery tasting fruit. I didn’t know this till my husband started researching sustainable farming, regenerating soils, and other agricultural helpful tips. If the strawberry plants are watered too much, they may look good, but taste watery with only a hint of the boldness it could have.
There are many in religious circles who seem to have it all together. They may say and do the right things, but on the inside, there’s no flavor. They don’t have the richness of flavor that a true relationship with Jesus brings. They may even be able to do amazing things – healing, prophesying, and other miracles – and they may have the most beautiful strawberries around, but their fruit has no flavor. Another result that comes when overwatering? Nutritional deficiencies. The fruit looks good, but cannot go on to provide nutritional sustenance for others.
To produce boldness in the body of Christ, we need to focus and teach who we are in Christ and not who we were before. We need to have the bold flavor, the nutrient-rich fruit that can only come from following the lead of the Holy Spirit. If it’s true (and it is) that we will be known by our fruit, it’s not just the appearance that we will be known by. We will also be known for our flavor and nutritional content. Will anything grow when it’s berated, shamed, and condemned on a regular basis? For some scientific experiments regarding growth under love and hate, check out this post from a couple years ago: Wonder of Words.
While I may be craving foods that are not the healthiest (yes, I’ll take that grape soda and coffee ice cream now – heck – throw in the apple fritter, too!), my nesting isn’t stopping with cribs being set up and everything being washed. I want this baby to come into this family and never have a doubt about who God is. I want her to feel secure in being loved, have no doubt that He sees her as He sees Christ, and know that He is good. Don’t you think He wants that for His kids? Let’s stop showing contempt for what really brings people to a nutrient-rich relationship with God: His love, kindness, tolerance, patience, and goodness (Romans 2:4).