I was convicted a while back for dropping the proverbial ball with my goals of memorizing scripture. It dawned on me that I completely neglected three passages that I had set out to memorize. I did go through the process of successfully memorizing Psalm 91, but there were quite a few places where I stumbled over my words when I went through it a few weeks ago. I had been so excited that I had memorized the entire chapter… only to let some of it slip through the cracks of my cranium because I neglected to keep it fresh in my mind. Guess I wasn’t as successful as I originally thought.
In pretty short order, I can recognize the quantity (and quality) of my time with God based on how I respond to stressful situations. If I’ve been immersed in the Word on a regular basis, meditating on nuggets of truth, and recently refreshed through soaking in praise and worship, then I will be cool as a cucumber when trouble comes. And trouble always comes. No matter who you are and no matter how holy and put together others think you are, troubling moments, times, and situations do not seem to discriminate.
I bet Mother Teresa faced troubles and uncertainties in her life of sacrifice – always helping others with a touch of grace. I bet Billy Graham faced car problems from time to time just like the rest of us – I wonder if he broke down when he, well, broke down? It’s not the absence of problems, but it is how we choose to respond when those problems come that reveal the depth of our relationship with God. Oh, how I want to be walking this out better!
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.” Jeremiah 17:7-8 NLT
I bet you’re familiar with the hope that springs up when you feel pretty confident that a job interview went well. Maybe you’re in dire need of a good job and your heart is set on one in particular. When the call comes that they went in a different direction, it can hit pretty hard. You were already dreaming and making plans – only to have them dashed. Maybe you had some medical treatment and you’re waiting on test results to find out how successful things went. How crushing it can be to find out that nothing changed. Perhaps it’s been harsher than that and you’ve been told that there’s nothing that can be done for you or your loved one.
For me, more recently, it was nothing compared to a bad medical report – it was merely a house. We’ve been in the market for a house for more than four years and we had found one that we were excited about. We even put out a fleece and God responded in a beautiful way – at least we thought so. I was picturing our life being lived in those rooms – the space used for school, for work, for crafting, for hosting Bible studies… the yard would look great with a small garden and a chicken coop. And coffee tastes so much better drinking it while sitting on a wide porch.
When the house I was dreaming about went into pending status and it was not put in that status by us, I would like to say that I handled it with grace… but I’m not quite Mother Teresa. It started out with the basic feelings of being bummed. It’s okay to be upset and it’s okay to mourn, but I decided to keep circling back to those feelings. In one moment, I would tell myself that the purchase could fall through, and we would have another chance. Then I would remind myself that it’s a great house and a great deal, so why would they back out?
I was not doing myself any favors. I wasn’t mourning, I was dwelling. There’s a difference. My emotions went from high to low, low to high, and I started to recall a line from Anne of Green Gables where Anne tells Marilla that she’s in the depths of despair. Marilla responds (in the movie) by telling Anne that to despair is to turn your back on God. Of all the lines, that is one that has stuck with me for decades. I’ve been choosing to allow the spiral. I was choosing to not turn to God for His best, but to throw a pity party with a revolving door.
Scripture tells us to take every thought captive (II Corinthians 10:3-6) – I have to be very intentional in that process! Instead of dwelling on all the negative things in my life (mostly perceived, I might add), I should be renewing my mind with God’s Word (Romans 12:2). This would streamline the process of having thoughts that are true, honorable, and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8).
It’s so much more than a lack of discipline with memorizing scripture – it shows that my roots aren’t very deep and I’m still very immaturely shakable – and in that, I’m not satisfied. It’s time to slam that revolving door.
I love the Jeremiah 17:7-8 passage – maybe I’ll even get it memorized! No matter the trouble (because there’s always trouble), that person is not going to be bothered or worried and will never stop producing fruit because they are deeply planted in God’s unending supply of love. That sounds like someone I want on my team. That sounds like someone who will encourage and shine brightly no matter the darkness they’re facing. It sounds like someone who will have a door close for them and they will be encouraged because there’s a door that is even better that will be opened for them.
I’m still learning that it would probably be a bit more productive to not break down (over and over again) when things break down. That can be a seamless process only if my trust and hope is in God. He is the stream that I need to be planted by. And as I taste of His goodness, I’ll want more and more so my roots will naturally stretch down deep. Then, when the troubles come (without discrimination) I will not be shaken.
I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice. My body rests in safety. For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave. You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever. Psalm 16:7-11 NLT
No matter what you’re facing, I pray that you’ll choose to take your thoughts captive, immerse yourself in God’s Word, and be encouraged that you will see the goodness of God all the days of your life (Psalm 23, Psalm 27:13).