Ever notice that the milestone birthdays are never enough? When a person turns one, they don’t even remember it. The age of nine is a big one because it’s the last year the person will ever be a single digit, but it’s not usually considered a milestone because the focus is on being a double-digit. Eleven and twelve are never good enough because they aren’t a teenager. Then jump to fourteen – who cares about that birthday? Fifteen and sixteen are when you can (depending on where you live) go for your learner’s permit and license. Nothing big at seventeen, and then you get to your first year of adulthood. By the time you get to the milestone of twenty-one, you have an understanding of why adulthood requires alcohol. I’m actually kidding on that last one. It’s been almost two years since I had a drink and I’ve enjoyed more living in the last two years than the others that came before it. Adulthood is a bit of a wake up call to some, and I can testify that alcohol is not the answer. I bring up milestones because this year is one for me… but there’s a choice in this milestone… and it piggybacks a move.
There have been many moves throughout my life. I’ve lived in three different countries, and even more states. As many of you may be able to relate, there are also those moves within the same state – sometimes even the same town. In both my childhood and my adulthood, I even experienced a move from one house to another that was on the same street! The wonderful thing about moving is that it almost forces you to clean out. When I moved from the east coast to Alaska, I downsized a three-bedroom apartment to what would fit in the bed of the truck and in my car. I’m not sure I’ve ever had so many tax receipts. Moving, and the forced purging, is invigorating and the choices can be stressful!
I’ve been exceptionally blessed (or I just notice the blessings for what they are) to have good people to gather with no matter where I’ve been – country, state, and town. Friends that have been like family; family that has become my friends, and my own inner circle of love. It’s typical that I spend time reflecting as my birthday peeks around the corner, but it’s deeper this year even with the hectic reality of preparing to move back across the country. I’m not only taking stock of my life to this point, but I’m also doing a bit of reflecting on my decade in Alaska. And determining my choices as I move forward.
It’s said that with age comes wisdom. I’m not sure that’s entirely true. I’ve known foolish individuals who were many years my senior, and I’ve known peers and others in their youth who were worlds wiser than me. Wisdom can be found in anyone who has an open mind and a softened heart. Experience is optional, but not a requirement. In my experience, I’ve also found that experience can actually harden a heart and close the mind. But God is good…
“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.” Ezekiel 36:26 (NIV)
I’ve had many ups and downs in my life, some pivotal moments in the last ten years, and I can’t help but see God through all of it. I’ve learned quite a bit from experience, but truths set in because I allowed God to soften my heart and open my mind. There have also been multiple failings that seemed to outweigh the victories, but wisdom has shown me that none of my failings can possibly outweigh the victory I have in Jesus. I’ve said it before and I will continue to say it: God is good.
I’ve had people reject the message of how deep and wide God’s unfathomable grace is because they’ve mistakenly deduced that I’m anti-law. Throw the baby out with the bathwater. I’m not anti-law for the purpose the law was intended. I am anti-condemnation, I’m anti-self-righteousness, and I’m anti-works-to-buy-salvation. Law abiding in our own power is not of faith – anything done outside of faith is sin (Romans 14:23). I’m also opposed to condemnation from the pulpit because it is the Holy Spirit’s place to convict, and there’s no one in this world who can do the job better. If someone thinks that I believe grace gives license to sin so we can all go live in sin, you’re choosing to hear it spun that way – that’s not what I believe or write.
“And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.” Ezekiel 36:27 (NIV)
I have come to recognize that I can either choose to be a victim or I can choose to be victorious. I can choose to take offense or I can choose to forgive. I can choose to fear or I can choose faith. I can choose to look for God’s goodness in every situation or I can choose to be blind to it. I can choose gratitude or I can choose grievance. In everything, I can choose because God is good.
While there are many things and all people that are out of my control – along with milestone birthdays – I am empowered with the realization that I still have a choice. It wasn’t that God was testing Adam and Eve by placing certain trees within reach – He gave them the freedom to choose because He loved them. He again presented the choice between life and death, blessings and curses, in Deuteronomy 30:19. These choices were presented right before Moses’ death and Joshua being appointed as his successor. Fast-forward to shortly before Joshua’s death and the choice is once again presented: choose whom you will serve (Joshua 24:15).
God wants us to choose Him, but when Adam and Eve messed up, God made a way for us to again have a choice (Jesus). I’ve made a lot of rotten choices in my life and I’m sure I’ll make some real humdinger choices as I proceed on… but not one of them or the sum of them can ever outweigh the grace that has saved me. When it comes to the scales of justice, mine don’t even move because I have been so thoroughly justified (Galatians 2:15-16, Romans 3:22-26, Romans 4:25-5:1-11 – and so many more). And not just mine, but the “humdinger” choices of the entire world (I John 2:2) – for all time (Hebrews 10:12-14).
I can choose to let the stress of a cross-country move get to me, but how will that benefit me (and those around me)? I can wallow in grief in going over that infamous hill, but how will that benefit me? As I spend time reflecting (instead of packing), I can’t help but choose to focus on the gratitude I have. Gratitude for all of my milestone birthdays past and to come, gratitude for the opportunity that has set our move into motion, gratitude for wisdom being available and attained, and gratitude for being chosen first.
“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” I Peter 2:9 (NIV)
“For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight…” Ephesians 1:4 abridged (NIV)
“We love because he first loved us.” I John 4:19 (NIV)