One of my favorite movies, You’ve Got Mail, has the phrase most of us have heard if you’ve ever felt slighted in a business transaction: It’s not personal, it’s just business. Or maybe you’ve slighted someone in a business transaction and comforted yourself with that saying. Meg Ryan plays the character of Kathleen Kelly (the leading lady) and questions what is so wrong with being personal. She then states, Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.
From the moment of conception, we thrived on personal. We had a very personal connection with our mother – literally attached and growing within her, and once we were born, that connection may have changed a bit, but we still sought after a personal relationship with her. We cried in an effort to get everything we needed: food, getting a diaper changed, and for the comforting embrace of personal. We began with personal, but then it seems as though we’re encouraged to shift to business with the possibility of personal on the side.
I grew up in a home that strictly enforced a 10% giving from all money that came to be in our possession. I would get a birthday check from my grandparents and would have to give 10% right off the bat. That’s huge for a kiddo growing up at the very bottom of middle class. Payday comes around the first check many Christians write is to the church as if it were just another bill. It very clearly sends the message that it’s not personal, it’s just business.
I’m not opposed to giving to the church, or as many see it as giving back to God. There have been so many times that we have given more than 10% when we were not really in a financial position to give anything… but it was in our hearts to give, and God blessed our steps of faith. It was personal… not business. There have also been times that we forgot to bring our offering, but we didn’t wallow in shame or condemnation because we recognized that God knows our heart – He’s not angry with us when we don’t perform perfectly.
My husband and I are guiding a small group Bible study through our church, and the first week we focused on our approach to God. All the way back to Adam and Eve and the two trees in the garden (Genesis 2:15-3:1-13, 20-24). The Tree of Life and the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Both life and knowledge sound pretty good, don’t they? There are many verses in the Bible that encourage us to get knowledge… but it’s not the same kind of knowledge.
The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil offers an approach to God of works and duty, triumphs and failures. We see a homeless person begging for money or food and we give to them because we think it’s the right thing to do, not because the Holy Spirit nudged us to give. It’s a head knowledge, not a heart nudge. We give 10% from our birthday check but find that we kind of resent the fact that we have to give it. We’re constantly seeking God’s approval because we’re convinced we have to do more in order to satisfy an angry God. We’re only giving and performing out of a sense of duty in order to earn God’s approval. This kind of knowledge is terrible and brings about death!
The Tree of Life on the other hand offers a completely different approach. Instead of focusing on what we’ve accomplished (nothing of any significance), our focus is on what Jesus accomplished (absolutely everything and lacking nothing). Instead of giving out of duty, we bring an offering out of delight. Instead of working our tail off to get God’s approval, we rest in the truth that says God already approves of us. We don’t focus on enduring church and doing good things, but we get to enjoy them because it’s personal, not business!
Our approach to God is going to be from one of those trees. We’re either going to see our shame and guilt and flaws and try to cover ourselves with fig leaves, or we’re only going to see Jesus and allow Him to provide for us His own personal robe of righteousness.
As we sat discussing this amazing concept of operating from either of the two trees, I couldn’t help but think about how deeply personal this relationship with God has to be in order to approach Him from the Tree of Life. And then I recognized how often I swing back and forth from tree to tree. Sometimes I sit down to read my Bible because I know it’s the right thing to do, but I would rather be doing something else. I don’t always really want to help someone with a need, but I do it because I know it’s the right thing to do. Anybody?
Which tree do you find yourself in right now? Recently? Like I said, I go back and forth. It’s a constant shift that I try to be mindful of. When I recognize that I’ve been operating in the wrong tree, it’s pretty easy to change my approach to God. Most of the time I throw on my praise and worship playlist and I land in the right tree. Sometimes this happens when I consider how much God loves me and realize that I’m not even close to grasping just how much that really is.
When I focus on myself and all the ways I think I’m pretty awesome, I fall short every time to what is required to be considered righteous. No matter how much good I do, if I’m doing it out of a sense of paying back a debt or out of obligation – a business transaction – then it fails to hit the mark. The mark is always personal with God. The mark is always a heart matter, not a head matter.
“The day is coming,” says the Lord, “when I will make a new covenant with the people of Israel and Judah. This covenant will not be like the one I made with their ancestors when I took them by the hand and brought them out of the land of Egypt. They broke that covenant, though I loved them as a husband loves his wife,” says the Lord. “But this is the new covenant I will make with the people of Israel after those days,” says the Lord. “I will put my instructions deep within them, and I will write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. And they will not need to teach their neighbors, nor will they need to teach their relatives, saying, ‘You should know the Lord.’ For everyone, from the least to the greatest, will know me already,” says the Lord. “And I will forgive their wickedness, and I will never again remember their sins.” Jeremiah 31:31-34 NLT
This new covenant God was referring to is what Jesus provided for us on the cross. We are living in this new covenant of grace .. I will forgive their wickedness, and I will never again remember their sins. The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil brings condemnation and shame – why are you only giving 10%, only volunteering two times a month, and how could you do something so wicked? The Tree of Life brings conviction to change without condemnation and shame – you trusted God by giving, it becomes a joy to volunteer, and choosing life becomes an organic response.
We began with personal, we turned to business, but we are re-established in personal. I can’t help but appreciate and praise God for giving me His comforting embrace of personal. Only personal gives life. What will you choose?