For or Against?

As many of you might know, we moved. We were doing well where we were, but we wanted to be closer to family – give our kiddos the chance to grow up running with their cousins. God opened the doors that had previously been shut, so we took it as the time to walk right on through. For a family that is self-employed, when jobs line up before you’re fully moved to your new location, it’s huge! My husband was already working while I was unpacking boxes.

The move, as wonderful as it has turned out to be, took us 4 hours away from our church home. This wasn’t just a church we attended on Sundays. We were on the prayer team, leading small groups, attending small groups, and volunteering for the nursery. It was June 2022 that I recognized that I needed people – people that I could do life with, share joys and sorrows with, lean on for prayer and support and be someone to be leaned on as well. We found our people in our church – abundantly. It wasn’t just a church home – it was family.

And now we’re 4 hours away.

We’ve gone to 5 different churches in 3 different towns. One of them felt dirty and the sermon was slow and lacking, one of them felt clean but the pastor was preaching out of both sides of his mouth, one of them holds some promise but both my husband and I are on the fence, and another is pretty good but lacking in some of the groups and programs we’re looking for. Our kiddos just want to find a church where they can go to youth group or be part of the summer camp (VBS – Vacation Bible School). The kiddos don’t seem to understand some of the nuances that go into finding a church to grow in.

I’m starting to wonder if I should put much stock in the different labels that people have placed on churches. Is this God’s way of telling me that there are still church hurts and that it’s time to let Him heal them? Perhaps that’s what He’s nudging my heart about. Or maybe it’s that I have a prejudice against certain denominations because of things I’ve only heard about but not personally experienced.

With all of this church hopping – or church shopping – I’ve come to see that each church I’ve compared to our old church. Our old church does this so much better… wow, I can’t believe they didn’t do such and such – I thought every church did it this way… Oh yes, people! The judgment has been flying through my head! Not everyone can say this, but I actually remember what it was that caught my heart when it came to our old church. They did something that I’d never witnessed another church do: they made time in their service to pray for another local church.

Every Sunday, it was part of their service – pray for another local church. No matter what church or what Christian denomination, they found it important to pray for another church. They prayed for the leadership of the other churches as well as the hearts of all who entered the church doors to be softened to the Holy Spirit. This was the first time that I realized that so many churches seem to be in competition against one another instead of standing in the spiritual gap and fighting for one another.

The church against the church? Is this a new thing?

Our old church was not the church for everyone, and they knew it. They knew that they couldn’t please everyone, but they could pray for every church that had their doors open. If they weren’t the ones actively ministering to someone, they could at least pray for the people who were actively ministering to them. They recognized that they weren’t going to lead everyone to Jesus, but they could pray for other churches that were doing the work of the kingdom.

That is the type of church I want to be a part of. That’s the type of church I want to do life with. And praying for other churches should be at the heart of all churches.

I find it so very sad when there are more than half a dozen Baptist churches with 10 minutes of each other and none of them seem to interact with each other. With our search for a new church, I’ve started wondering even more what God’s kingdom looks like – or is supposed to look like. History shows that people of God have had issues with other people of God – it’s not a new thing. But Jesus showed us God’s heart for all of His kiddos.

Jews and Samaritans were basically enemies, right? But Jesus didn’t seem to be opposed to going to Samaria, did He? No, He wasn’t. But He didn’t just go through Samaria – He first went to the most unlikely person – a Samaritan woman – who was an outcast even among her own people. He read her mail (not such an upstanding member of society, either) and gave her truth and love… and chose to stay in Samaria for a bit. He went to the people that were despised by the Jews and revival broke out. (Found in John 4:1-42)

One of the biggest complaints the Samaritan woman had was that she and her people were not allowed to worship God where God had instructed them to worship – because the Jews were disgusted by their pedigree.

Did you know that there are churches that will not allow a non-member to partake in communion with them? There are some denominations that will not serve communion to someone who has not been baptized. We could get into the nitty gritty here and ask what type of baptism is acceptable? Sprinkled or dunked? I may step on some toes here, but is communion about having union with the church or having union with God? Is it the table that belongs to one or another denomination or is it God’s table?

In Matthew 15:21-28, some translations call the woman in the spotlight a Gentile, some a Canaanite, and others a Syrophoenician. She wasn’t exactly a Jew, she wasn’t exactly a Greek… if I were to be so bold, she was basically a mutt. A mix of several different worlds. Many people get offended when Jesus calls her a dog, but let’s take a moment to see what He actually called her.

In those days, Jews would typically refer to Gentiles as dogs or wild curs… an animal that was spiritually unclean and not a nice thing to call anyone (kuon – Strong’s G2965), but Jesus used the word kunarion (Strong’s G2952) which means puppy or house pet. For a bit more on her story, please take a moment to read my post Supply Between Borders. The woman submitted to His authority by calling Him Master – and He called her faith great.

As I read these two separate stories, one Samaritan woman and one who’s a bit of everything, I can’t help but think of all the different churches. These two women were shunned by those who weren’t of the same race or religion, but Jesus came and revealed that it wasn’t about race or religion at all… it was about a relationship.

I personally have preferred a non-denominational church over the past decade, but I’m finding the need to check my heart. Am I looking down my nose at all the other churches with an opinion of them being less than? Am I afraid of being rejected by other denominations if I pick an opposing one? Perhaps it would be a better use of my time to pray that God leads us to the right church for our family regardless of it being non-denominational or not.

I’m not so sure that denomination really matters as long as it is a church that is being led by the Holy Spirit.

In Joshua 5:13-14, Joshua asks the commander of the army of the Lord if he is for them or their enemies. The answer has always bugged me. Of course, the commander of the army of the Lord was there for them – in the very next chapter, we find out that Jericho was already beat (Joshua 6:2). But instead of stating that He was for them or for Jericho, the answer was neither. I know that this is not referring to churches or different denominations, but it points to the heart of God.

God isn’t out for a specific denomination, a pedigree or any type of performance. He’s always simply been after our heart.

As a sister in Christ, as a woman of faith that does not belong to a local church (yet), I would ask that you pray for our church search. And might I challenge you to start praying for churches that you don’t belong to? Maybe even talk to your pastor about making it a regular part of their service. We might just find that we’re all the church.