A Blessing

Of all that I’m thankful for, I’ve found that I’m most thankful for my family. Yes, my family on my side – funny how it’s a his and hers thing – but I’m most recently referring to the “his” side of the family. We just had the honor of gathering for my brother-in-law’s wedding. Of all of the siblings, he was the one most wanting to settle down, get married, and have a small village of children. This past weekend, he became the final sibling to tie the knot. I’m sure the children will follow eventually.

While the ceremony was beautifully put together in the simplistic intimacy of family bonds, and I absolutely cried my eyes out for the pureness of the visible love shared, I loved the shared laughter while working to bring the day together for the bride and groom. Until the wedding weekend, it had been 6 years since the four siblings had all been together. It was a chorus of laughter, inside jokes, and lovingly poking fun.

After ten years of marriage, I noticed that I finally feel at ease to joke and tease with my in-laws. It may not have taken that long had we not been separated by so much geography and the typical obligations and pitfalls of life. You can probably guess it, but I’ll say it anyway: all of this got me to thinking about God and His amazing goodness. It’s so easy to go there when you can’t help but see the goodness in the faces around you.

When you love someone, it’s so easy to want the best for them. You hope and pray they will experience all that God has for them, an abundance of blessings, and you cheer them on at the opportune and not-so-opportune moments. This was not always the case for my relationship with my brother-in-law. From what I’ve gathered, we have a bit in common when it comes to personalities. He’s much more extreme than I am, but we don’t like to sit around when there are things to get done. As the character, Junior, in the movie “Storks” says, “We make a plan, stick to the plan; always deliver!” While plans often change, it doesn’t deter us from still doing what needs to be done.

Needless to say, there were many years that we butted heads and pretty well hated each other. Perhaps “hate” is not the word I’m looking for, but we tolerated each other because we both loved the same person. His brother, my husband. For better or for worse (there was a lot of worse!), we were stuck as family – and we didn’t like each other at all. Then it changed when assumptions once made were cleared up with truth. The truth is definitely what sets captives free.

For the past few years, we’ve become more than friends; we’ve become family. I was blessed to tears when he stated that he wanted us both at his wedding because I was not his sister-in-law, but his sister. Tears. Snot. Everywhere. Needless to say, even though it was not the best timing for our family to make a trip, I jumped on finding flights. He had blessed me by enveloping me into the family. I was now wanting to do all we could do to be a blessing to him and his bride. The concept of “blessed to be a blessing” goes all the way back to Abraham.

“I will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you.” Genesis 12:2-3 (NIV)

I fully believe that I am blessed to be a blessing; I am grafted in (Romans 11). Very similar to marrying into a family. While my brother-in-law has welcomed me into the family, I wholeheartedly welcome my new sister-in-law. Family is supposed to bless us in their support, their love, their encouragement, and in their words of counsel (among various other ways).

My brother-in-law and his bride had a beautiful ceremony that included time for blessings to be spoken over them as well as a time to take part in the Holy Communion. Since I had been teary and snotty when helping the bride put on her bracelet, I knew better than attempting to speak a blessing over them – like I would be able to get any words out between the snot dripping and tears running. My prayer – my blessing – for two people I love… where do I even begin?

From the time of creation, mankind has had a desire for companionship. Both of them have experienced a wide range of emotions in their search; joys and sorrows, healing balms and searing pain. And God’s comforting strength that they could never outrun.

For my brother-in-law and my new sister-in-law, God has used your experiences to shine a spotlight on complementing characteristics and personalities. He’s brought the calm to the storm; the mountains to the seaside surf. Both with a heart for Him and a heart for blessing others. You’re blessed to bless and I’m so happy for you both that I cannot find the right words – right now I’m not a fan of irony.

*C*, thank you for being my friend, a source of direct and uncensored Godly wisdom, and professional movie quoter (that’s not a word, but I’m already having issues, so cut me some slack). You effortlessly push others to be the best versions of themselves that they can possibly be. It’s an honor to be your sister and enveloped into the family – in your eyes. Don’t hesitate to lead in prayer together – daily. Be ever mindful of your wife’s needs and desires, and strive to serve God, your wife; your family.

*K*, you hurt him, I’ll kill you. Just kidding! For someone to come into his life and be able to stand up to him yet also graciously take guidance, I actually wasn’t sure it would ever happen. You are so uniquely and perfectly suited to do life together. You’ve so quickly become a friend that I look forward to seeing, and have so seamlessly found your place in our family. Don’t hesitate to speak up in what you’re needing from your husband (men really don’t read minds – and often have hearing issues, too!). Be ever mindful of your husband’s needs and desires, and strive to serve God, your husband; your family.

Some annoying person once told me that it takes teamwork to make the dream work (this did not originate from my brother-in-law, but he would joke that it did). Well, I’m saying it right back to you and your bride. Stay soft-hearted to the voice of the Holy Spirit. Continue to seek God’s truth together. And remember: you’re blessed.